Staying Focused

Think of what lies below the surface of a woman's skin. Foul smelling flesh coupled with blood is the nature of everything under the so called gloss of the human skin. All Brahmacharis must smell their very own blood and raw flesh when they experience a bruise or a cut. It has the most disagreeable and repulsive smell. This is what the female body is all about. Under the skin lie flesh, fat, blood, excrement, urine, pus, phlegm and stool. This body is a well disguised bag of flesh, reinforced by bone, containing filth and refuse. There is nothing really attractive or appealing to the smallest extent.

This is why men & women go to great lengths investing on deodorants, body sprays and perfumes - To hide the smell of filth that eventually surfaces some time after having a bath.

This is why aromatic compounds are added into toothpastes, soaps and detergents; to help one temporarily hide the stench of bad breath, sweat and other bodily secretions that cling to one's clothes.

Where is the beauty in the bad breath emanating from the mouth of a beautiful woman when she wakes up in the morning? Where is the beauty in the young woman after she has borne a child or two? Where is the beauty in an old lady with a shrunken frame, scant hair, dried up skin, wrinkled flesh and a body emanating disagreeable smell? The complete reality of what lies behind the skin is revealed and there for all to see in such a body devoured by age and time. Only maggots, bacterium and vermin would look forward to feast on such a decaying body. This is what the so called intelligent, couth, highly refined, cultured, civilized and sophisticated man feeds on when he initiates the sexual act with a woman for the purpose of recreation. Can there be anything more demeaning and distasteful?

Is it worth fantasizing and drooling over such a bag of refuse?
Is it worth losing the most vital of all fluids produced after drawing from all essences that the body possesses on this bag of refuse or for this bag of refuse?
Is it worth squandering away on this bag of filth, that divine and nectar like fluid which is one's very Atman (self)? He who loses his semen loses a part of his very self in the process. It is gone and burnt for ever. This is the absolute truth. Let all Brahmacharis remember this serious and factual statement whenever they are assailed by lust at the sight or thought of a woman. This reality should be remembered by all Brahmacharis, every time they see a woman. One should constantly remind and recollect these facts when the sight of a woman is found to be troublesome.

The national poet of India, Shri. Rabindranath Tagore has written a beautiful poem to this effect concerning an episode from the life of a Buddhist monk. Given below is the story which every Brahmachari should read and remind himself of on a daily basis:-

One of Buddha's bhikkhus is passing through a village. He is very handsome, and meditation has added a dignity, a grace to his beauty. Silence has crystallized within him and its rays are emanating from his eyes and his face. An aura of light and Ojas has graced him. One very famous prostitute sees him and is enamored of him.

That prostitute comes to him and requests the bhikkhu to rest for one night in her palace. The bhikkhu replies, "There is no rule about this so I will not refuse your invitation. I will come, but the time is not yet right. When the actual reality of your body is revealed to you, that's when I will come. Right now you are mistaken. The day you awake to the reality of it, I will come."

The prostitute could not understand this. The very meaning of a prostitute is one who does not understand any other language but the language of the body. So do not think that just because a woman is somebody's wife, she is not a prostitute. If she understands only the language of the body, she is a prostitute. As long as the language of the soul is not understood, nobody can rise above prostitution. And don't think that the word prostitute applies only to women; no, it applies to men too. Only the language of the body is understood; all transactions are carried out at the body level. The whole mind is focused only on the body, the body itself is the trade -- This is all that is meant by the word prostitute.

The bhikkhu said, "I will certainly come, but only when the reality of your body is revealed to you."

The prostitute said, "Are you mad? This is the time for you to come -- while I am young and at the peak of my beauty. My body will never be in any better condition."

The bhikkhu replied, "The concern is not for the better, the concern is for the real. When your body manifests its reality, then I will come."

The prostitute said, "I am unable to understand what you say. Please make it clear to me.

The bhikkhu said, "When nobody comes to you anymore then I will come, because at that time, your body will be showing its reality. Then the body will look the same from the outside as it really is inside. Right now it does not look the same on the outside as it really is inside. So when nobody comes to you, then I will come."

Many years passed, and the prostitute became old, leprosy had spread all over her body, every limb had started wasting and rotting away, and the people threw her outside the village. These were the same people who used to hover around her door! These were the same people who used to be dying for an entry into her palace, who used to consider themselves lucky and grateful even to get a distant glimpse of her. The same people. It was a dark night with no moon. She was in agonizing pain and thirst lying on the outskirts of the village. There was nobody even to offer her a cup of water.

That night, the bhikkhu came; he laid his hand on her head and said, "I have come. Now your body is in its real condition, now nobody comes near you. Now the outside body has become the same as it is inside. Now the distance between the outside and the inside has disappeared. The illusion that the skin and flesh had is no longer there. Now the inner filth and pus are manifest outside also; now you are the same inside and outside. Now I have come. This is the day I had promised I would come when I said that when nobody else comes to you, I will come."

The bhikkhu further said, "As far as I was concerned, even at that first meeting I could see in you what has now manifested. Yes, then, you couldn't see it. I could have become your guest even on that day, there was no difficulty, but your illusion would have increased and you would think - "Now even bhikkhus have begun to be my guests." I had no difficulty; I could have come on that first day, because I could see your body as it is today. What the whole village can now see, I had seen that day."

But that prostitute, now lying on the outskirts of the village, was not looking at her body. With closed eyes, she was still remembering those days when she had a beautiful body, when she had dignity and lived with pride in the village. Even in old age, people reflect about their days of youth. When the body manifests itself in its true form, they continue to cover it up with their mind. When even the skin cannot hide their old age, they close their eyes and delight in brooding over the past without ever realizing that they are not the body and without thinking of who they really are - The 'Atman' -- End of story.

For a few years, when in her prime, to aid creation and continuation of the race, God bestows a small part of his very own beauty into the body of a woman. Else who would take the responsibility of mating with such a bag of refuse? So there be a very strong tendency among creatures to continue their species, the great Lord has bestowed a small part of his immense bliss into the sexual orgasm or climax. Else who would be prepared to face the depression, disorientation, loss of health, vigor and life energy that accrues from losing one's vital fluid? This is the 'Maya' or play of the Almighty to ensure continuation of the race. The purpose of the power of attraction of a woman and apparent pleasure of the sexual act is this much and not more. It is to attract the male, form a family and produce offspring. If these pleasures were not associated with the activity, not one single man on earth would go ahead and agree to take the responsibility of forming a family and fathering offspring. It is the power of cupid that drives man in this direction and nothing else. So creation should continue, God has made the sexual urge in all creatures mammoth and very powerful. The wise man realizes this truth and limits his sexual contact to aid the birth of a child or two with his wife and never more. The foolish man becomes a slave to this bag of filth and wastes his life away into untold agony and suffering.

Everywhere I have used the word 'woman' is in the sense of representing that which is female and a sexual distraction for man. This is not meant to show disrespect to womenkind or insult them. When women read these answers, they should substitue the word 'woman' with the word 'man' and 'man' with 'woman'. Then, the right meaning flows through. By referring to the human body as a body containing filth, it is intended that people looking at the body of a man or woman through the sexual perspective realize the fallacy of their approach and get fixed to reality. In reality, we are neither man nor woman but only the Atman (pure soul). Just as we wear different clothes at different times, the body of man or a woman is the dress worn by the soul and not the soul itself. The Atman is neither male nor female, so we are neither male nor female. The Atman is much above these petty limitations of a female or a male body. It is the Almighty himself and omnipresent. So we are much above the limitations or need for sexuality. It is the result of ignorance around the soul that makes the pure Atman into the Jivatma (embodied soul) and makes it take a male or a female body. Wash all this ignorance along with the past karma away and the pure Atman is what remains. The whole aim of Yoga and Brahmacharya is to succeed in washing away this ignorance and delivering the Atman back into his default state of purity and bliss within the Almighty.

All impediments that one faces in the quest for Brahmacharya are the result of the ignorance around the soul and the delusion that follows. Based on one's past karma, the Jivatma (embodied soul) comes to the environment and surroundings that it finds itself in. Nothing happens by accident or by fluke. Every little occurance in each and every person's life is destined by the Almighty for working out this karma and rising one up on the ladder of evolution. The Jivatma learns an important lesson and progresses one little step through each and every earthly experience. Nothing goes to waste. So one should never give in or give up on the path of Brahmacharya carried out with the intent of self-realization even further to breaks; for there is always hope and success for even the most troubled soul.

I will request you to perform Thribandha and Pranayama followed by meditation everyday before 5.00 A.M in the morning after having a bath and at Sunset in the evening without fail. Note very carefully the Pranayama schedule and method that is to be followed:-

1. After waking up and having a bath, Pray to God asking him to redeem you of all impediments in the path of Brahmacharya for the attainment of self-realization. Then, perform a few simple Asanas such as Paschimothaanasana, Padahasthaasana, Halasana and Sarvangaasana a few times (google search the method of performing these Asanas)
2. Now start the practice of the Thribandha (methods of performing thribandha and Naadi shodhana is described in Swami Sivananda's book on Pranayama which can be downloaded at: http://www.dlshq.org/download/pranayama.htm)
3. Perform Naadi Shodhana
4. Now should be practiced Pranayama. The method to be followed has been dealt in past answers in the following link: http://en.allexperts.com/q/Celibacy-Abstinence-3564/2011/5/Pranayama-Yoga-Brahma

Start the practice with 16 second breath retentions. Since the problem on hand is severe, perform 6 Pranayamas in the morning and 6 in the evening. After 40 days of such regular practice in the morning and evening, increase the breath retention to 24 seconds. After 40 more days, increase the retention to 32 seconds. If forty days are insufficient for achieving increasing retentions, take more time. Finally, you should be able to achieve six 64 second breath retentions in the morning and six in the evening. Do not rush and do not hurry. Pranayama should be practiced very slowly, smoothly and gently.

After completing Pranayama, one should make the mind blank and meditate on the Almighty in Padmasana with no other thought for a few minutes. Longer durations of meditation will occur by themselves as the aspirant advances. The process is to be repeated at Sunset in the evening.

If the above mentioned routine morning and evening is followed with devotion and reverance to God, the tendency and urge to masturbate will leave the apirant within 6 months from the start of practice. It could even happen earlier, if carried out honestly and by the grace of God. Further to one year of unbroken Brahmacharya with the aforesaid Pranayama that is finally taken to 64 seconds of six sets (64*6=384 seconds) in the morning and six sets (64*6=384 seconds) in the evening, there will not be the least trace towards masturbation and the aspirant will develop distaste and Vairagya (disapassion) at the very thought of ejaculating semen. It will greatly help in one's journey towards becoming an Urdhvareta. The mind becomes calm and under one's control. The aspirant develops the ability to withhold ejaculation even in a sexually oriented wet dream and can prevent the wet dream from reaching climax by the practice of 'Mula Bandha' even in sleep. The Yogic practices should then never be stopped but should be carried out on a daily basis except on a day when one is seriously ill. This will help you overcome the problem on hand without doubt and help negate the karma accrued from previous masturbation.

ॐ तत् सत्
(That Supreme being is the absolute truth)