Decisions of life
Question
Dear Sir,
I feel like I have lost the capability to make important decisions and move forward in life.
Presently, I need to find a job ... I am jobless for 1.5 years now and my family is becoming concerned, I dont still know where to go, what to do and even where to ask for guidance. My legs feel heavy when I try to move even an inch and there seems darkness and an invisible wall in any direction I see.
Also I broke the faith of girl who trusted me knowing that I cannot be sure if I would be able to ultimately marry her or not and therefore should keep away until god makes a decision.
Yet they are no directions in sight, trying to make a decision feels heavy and I feel like im not doing my duty properly. Im stuck at the crossroads ... It feels i have let everyone down.
PS: I do sometimes feel oneness with universe but living in physical world is becoming harder and harder. I guess my real question is whats preventing spirit to illuminate all my life and not just few moments once in while. Im unable to encompass beingness in daily living.
Answer
Do the suggested Sadhana, to realize the self, with unconditional surrender to God, asking nothing in return. It is that boat alone, which will help you cross the ocean of darkness, following which light will shine by itself.
ॐ तत् सत्
(That Supreme being is the absolute truth)