Distracting visions during meditation
Question
Dear Dhananjay,
I know you say not to share experiences during meditation until final liberation. But this has been bothering me for a while and I am not sure how to deal with it properly.
Sometimes times during meditation it seems like the breath almost stops and it feels like there's a force sucking me into void. But right as when it's about to happen, I have a vision of someone, and it looks so real that I get distracted. Like the other day, I was meditating, and it seemed like the mind had come to a thoughtless state and my mom yelled my name loudly from her bedroom. I got up to check on her, but it turned out to be a hallucination and my meditation was disturbed and I couldn't get back to thoughtless stat. Another time I was meditating as I was going to sleep, and my breath totally stopped and I was getting slightly excited and again my mom appeared and started a conversation with me. I knew from other days experience that this was not my real mom and just a hallucination, so I ignored her and kept meditating but my breath had resumed but very slow. The vision of my mother tried to pick a fight with me and said "I am going to get you married to this girl.." and kept yelling and came close. I was afraid that she would touch me and disturb me out of meditation, so I imagined a force field around me and imagined that Goddes Durga and Lord Hanuman are protecting me. Then as I continued meditating....a flock of pigeons appeared and surrounded me. The came really close to me and I knew that the forcefield was not working. One pigeon came and ticked me under my armpit and I couldn't stay still from tickling sensation, so I moved and suddenly all vision disappeared and then I couldn't get back to breathless state. Thing like this has happened at least 4-5 times where visions disturbed me. Can you please give me any tips on how to stay focused when such visions appear?
thank you very much,
much gratitude and love,
K
Answer
Persevere in proper Sadhana, as described earlier patiently. With time, the past Samskara-s which manifest as these visions will gradually break down and vacate, following which meditation becomes steady.
ॐ तत् सत्
(That Supreme being is the absolute truth)